It's that time of year again....

You know...that one particular holiday that is suppose to be all about love and romance, but usually ends up being about over-priced roses and long waits for restaurant seating.

I love Valentine's Day, I proudly admit that, but I do not love the over-hyped, over-priced pressures that have been put upon this day by the retail industry (candy, card, and jewelry sellers alike). Who would have thought that one little, non-federal holiday could create such high levels of stress and anxiety between couples everywhere?! But it does.

Women start daydreaming that this is the year their favorite, romantic movie scene will play out. Her prince charming will sweep her off her feet and fulfill her every fantasy. Okay, ladies.....it's time to WAKE UP! Even the most-romantic men rarely (if ever) show up with a white, horse-drawn carriage to whisk you away to a private, candle-lit restaurant, while a pianist plays and you sip wine and dance the night away (unless you're suddenly cast in As the World Turns.)

It's time to quit setting ourselves up for disappointment and it's time to let the men in our lives breathe a little easier. It's time we take a bit of the pressure and expectations off of this holiday.

 After reading a Cosmo article featuring what men wanted us to know about Valentine's Day, I had an epiphany. The article quoted one man as saying he wanted his girlfriend to be honest about what she wanted from him this year. Previously she'd said she didn't need anything for V-Day, then when a co-worker received a larger bouquet of roses (36 to her 6), she got bent out of shape!

It got me thinking. Thinking about what I would say I wanted. But, what did I really want this year? I wasn't sure. I hadn't really thought about it until that moment.

Times are tougher for us this year and I don't want money spent simply out of obligation. I've had the "it" thing the jewelry store was promoting just because it's Valentine's Day. It isn't as special when women across America all get the identical necklace! Truly! What I really want is just a cozy, romantic evening. Something he puts his own thought and effort into. So, I headed home to tell him, straight-up, what I wanted this year.

I told him about the article I had read and about my thoughts that followed. Then I added a little twist. I said, "I want creativity, effort and romance. So, to ensure all of that, I'm setting a $20 expense cap on the evening!" He about fell out of his chair! Certainly a budget like that wouldn't allow fancy restaurants or elaborate floral arrangements. My thoughts exactly! He agreed and we decided he would take Sunday the 13th for his creative endeavour and I'd take Monday the 14th.

In the end we'll get two days of romance for a mere $40! It will take plenty of effort on both our parts to pull it off, but knowing we put aside the commercialism of the holiday to return to the true heart of the occasion will be priceless.

I'll report back on how Operation 20 turns out! ;)

enjoy your celebration of love, however you choose to spend it!

-dw.

Review, Reaffirm, and Resolve...

New Year's is a time of reflection for many of us, myself included. While some struggle with where they are when they reach their milestone birthdays (30, 40, etc...), I never have. I tend to get that way with every holiday season and year's end. The same questions beg answering each year. Am I where I want to be? I am who I want to be? Some years I feel blessed to be exactly where I want to be and some years have been so earth-shattering that I want to be anywhere but here!

The other night Rog and I were looking at some old pictures left on an SD card and were trying to figure out when and where they were shot. I finally realized "Hey, these are from the wedding last year!" He responded with, "...whose wedding?!" After a quick toss with a sofa pillow aimed directly at his head, I said, "YOURS!" He quickly tried to save himself by explaining that it didn't seem possible that our wedding was only a little over a year ago. And I have to admit, I agree.

It seems like this year took the span of three years. We had a lot of family stuff going on. BIG stuff. Kid issues. The loss of Rog's dad. My dad's heart attack. Selecting a place and then moving my Grandmother into assisted living. Rog's mom staying with us for a couple weeks. His sister and bil here visiting. So many big events. Not to mention our cruise. 4 litters of puppies. Melissa's graduation. A major job change. Opening the Retreat House. The list just goes on and on. How ever did we fit ALL of that into one year?! No wonder we are exhausted!!!

But after all of that, when I ask myself that same ol' year-end question...Am I happy where I am at in life? My answer is, Yes, I am. Am I who I want to be? Well, like any ever-evolving project, I am not completely finished, but I am happy with who I am right this minute. I know there are things I need to still work on (my weight, my income, my patience level...), but overall I am content with the person I have become.

Like many of us that consider ourselves still "in work," I have things I resolve to try and improve on. So I will share that list another day. I need time to really think it through. Why make resolutions, some may be asking. Well, because I know, and Stephen Covey agrees, we are more likely to achieve the goal we write down and share out loud. So...I will make my list and get back to you.

Did you write a list? What is your greatest 2008 resolution? Did you write one last year that you achieved? Do tell.....

enjoy the accomplish of goals achieved!!!

-dw

Get Smart...Give Rice!

Mom forwarded me a link to this site because she knows

I love word games, vocabulary challenges, etc.

(I'm such a word nerd that as a kid, I would actually read the dictionary!)

It's a win-win kind of thing! We improve our vocabulary

while they donate food to the hungry!

http://www.freerice.com/

enjoy a way fun way to give back!

-dw

What were your childhood dreams?

Thanks to my friend, Shannon, I was introduced to an incredible man today! Not in person mind you, but rather through the magic of YouTube! I was mesmerized by his words and inspired by his life. His name is Randy Pausch. He is a college professor. He is a husband and a father. He is a Disney Imagineer. He has done some incredible things. But sadly, he is also dying of cancer.
In his Final Lecture at Carnegie Mellon University he gave a remarkable reflection on his teaching, his own life, and the pursuit of dreams. He not only shared what his childhood dreams were, but also how he achieved nearly every one of them! He has an infectious, positive spirit and I strongly urge everyone to watch the condensed version of his speech given on the Oprah show earlier this week.


So after listening to him, I am left wondering if I have had as much success reaching my childhood dreams. First, I have to take a moment to recall what those were....
* Live in a big house. Check. (Yes, materialistic even back then!)
* Eat steak for dinner anytime I want. Check.
* Be an artist. Check. (I have always found myself incorporating art into my life and have been in a very artistic industry for years -scrapbooking- and what kind of artist was really never identified so all is fair.)
* Be a writer. Check (While I never achieved a degree in journalism, I have been true to this dream almost every step of my life. My passion has always landed my thoughts on paper in one form or another.)
* Be a lawyer. (Few people know this about me, but I thought my ability to prove a point and my desire to right the wrongs of the world would lead me in this direction. In the end the artist in me won out. But watch out...I still tend to drive home a point when I have one!)

I guess I've been following my heart for years! Funny how our subconscious drives us even when our mind losses sight of our dreams.
So what are your childhood dreams? Did they true? Can they still?

Best said in one of my all-time favorite quotes....

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams and live the life you've imagined.
-Thoreau

enjoy the fulfillment of your dreams,
-dw.

What happened to Tuesday?

Some days just go by in a flash! While it was supposed to be my first "Tackle It" Tuesday, life kind of got in the way. I did get things done...just not the BIG, waiting to be tackled, things! We can organize and plan only so much of our day before the greater plan throws us a curve ball. And it is in that second our character is defined.

When a friend needs you, you try your best to help out. When your child needs you, however, you go anywhere, do anything, stop everything...to make their world better. So when the call came, I re-routed my day and went to lunch with my daughter. Now lunch may not seem like a big deal. I mean I had to eat anyway right?! But when teenage love goes awry, potstickers and soup are just the ticket to pour out one's heartache over. She's a senior with (may I brag for just a second?!!!) a 3.8 gpa so I let her take an extra long lunch and vent.
I love my time with her. She is growing up so fast and I am trying to take in as much as I can before things change. She will start college in the fall, and even though it is local, it is only a matter of time before she spreads her wings and moves out on her own. I am consoled though by her lack of cooking experience...pretty much a guarantee she will be around at dinnertime! LOL!
As graduation day approaches I realize more and more that tackling the BIG projects can wait another day. For in a second children are grown, and the project will still be the very same size. So I failed at my first Tackle It challenge, but I succeeded as a Mom and nothing counts more than that!

enjoy the moments life's plan throws your way....
-dw

This picture is one of her senoir portraits by Yen Lui Studios. Don't ya love those eyes?!!!

Okay, so it isn't Tuesday....

I just discovered a cool challenge! It was started on the 5MinutesForMom site, and it is all about getting in and tackling the long avoided, most dreaded, least fun tasks we need to accomplish in our week. By declaring one day a week to tackle even just one daunting duty maybe we can all get our "to do" lists cleared off. I mean, summer is coming. The sunshine will be calling. Who will want to stay indoors handling all the things we put off all winter and spring? Not me. So join me as I make a pledge to start crossing things off the list next Tuesday. Top on my list...calling the hospital billing department that didn't apply my insurance discount to my dd's $3000. bill for the necessary stitches. Isn't it insane that a trip to the hospital, even at 3am, should be that much money before insurance?!!! The 3am part of the story isn't as bad as it sounds. She fell getting up to let the dog out. Anyway, I digress....check out the link, tell us what you what to accomplish next Tuesday, and let's the challenge begin! (I need to re-size the link, but it will have to happen later today!)

And since we're talking about "to do" lists, I'm going to confess...I write things on my list sometimes even after I've done it just so I can cross it off! Does that make me a little bit crazy? Maybe. But it gives me a great sense of accomplishment! And that is very motivating!!!

enjoy checking off your "to do" list...

-dw

My New Coke Challenge...

Okay, so those that know me, know I LOVE Coke! I will not even consider drinking the competition. I even managed to get Roger hooked on it! When we met he was a total Pepsi guy! But he was perfect in so many other ways that I looked past it! After frequenting so many restaurants that only served Coke while we were dating (coincidence? hmmm...), he realized Coke WAS better than Pepsi!! All those years he wasted....sad. But anyway, I digress. I have known for some time that I need to cut back on my caffeine intake, but I have had a hard time doing it. With blood pressure and weight issues now demanding some serious life changes, I've decided to take the plunge and try and go cold turkey! No Coke for lunch. No trip through the McDrive thru for a quick, pick-me-up. None. Nada. Zilch. Just water. Lots of water. I realized today that a friend was at the same place in her life, so I threw down the gauntlet and the challenge is on. We are both trying to get healthier, so we'll commiserate together! Wanna join us?! The more the merrier!

enjoy!

-dw